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A Little Less Selfish: A God-ordered New Year's
Resolution
By Leann Guzman
January 10, 2005
A girl with the reputation for
being a little self-absorbed attends my colleague’s church and was singing with
the praise team one Sunday morning. The praise team was singing “It’s All about
You, Jesus” and she was to sing the chorus through, once as a solo. She began
singing the chorus, and when she came to the phrase, “It’s all about you,” with
her eyes closed, brow furrowed with intensity, she sang these words: “It’s all
about me, it’s all about me, Jesus.”
I promise you this is a true
story. And what’s even worse is this girl apparently didn’t even notice she
messed up the words and just kept singing with the same level of intensity. But
in actuality, this girl sang this song more honestly than anyone else in that
church that day because, think about it, is your life really all about Jesus?
Or is it more about you?
The New Year gives us a lot of
opportunity to make it all about us. As 2005 begins, millions of people are
focusing on themselves, purposing to achieve some level of self-improvement this
year. The goals we set for ourselves during this time are certainly not a bad
thing. According to
Goalsguy.com, the top five New Year’s resolutions are (1) lose weight; (2)
stop smoking; (3) stick to a budget; (4) save or earn more money; (5) get a
better job. All of these are admirable goals to set and achieve. (But if
you’re like most of the country and don’t stick to your resolution, check out
this
guide to responses when asked how your resolution is coming.)
What Are God’s Resolutions
for Me?
But God has been
quietly speaking to me lately about another goal He wants me to achieve—being
less selfish. Notice I didn’t say He’s asking me to become immediately
selfless, but, for now, just less selfish. Thankfully, He’s starting small.
When I was born, I was my
parents’ first child, and the first grandchild on both sides of the family.
Furthermore, I was an only child for almost 11 years before my sister was born.
If you don’t think I was set up to be selfish, think again. My husband runs
into my selfishness when we have to take turns playing computer games for one
player. If it’s computer game time at the Guzman household, you will often hear
these words from my husband, “You have to take turns!”
My selfishness also comes out
when I have to do things I don’t like to do. When it’s time to work on that
project at work that I keep putting at the bottom of my “To do” stack or when
it’s time to go apologize to my husband for something I said or did, I hear
these words in my head, “But I don’t want to do that.” And I’m willing
to bet I’m not the only one who struggles with this.
Application Comes Next
If you want to see
improvement in your relationships at home, at church and at work, or if you want
to have a better working environment, join me in this New Year’s resolution and
seek out ways to be less selfish. Jonathan Edwards, in his sermon
The Spirit of Charity: The Opposite of a Selfish Spirit, makes the point to
remind yourself that you are not your own:
As you have not made yourself,
so you were not made for yourself. You are neither the author nor
the end of your own being. Nor is it you that uphold yourself in being,
or that provide for yourself, or that are dependent on yourself. There is
another that hath made you, and preserves you, and provides for you, and on whom
you are dependent: and He hath made you for Himself, and for the good of your
fellow creatures, and not only for yourself. He has placed before you higher and
nobler ends than self, even the welfare of your fellowmen, and of society, and
the interests of His kingdom; and for these you ought to labor and live, not
only in time, but for eternity.
If that eloquent paragraph
doesn’t grab you, try the Bible, which says, “Look not every man on his own
things, but every man also on the things of others” (Philippians 2:4). Or,
as The Message puts it, “Don’t be obsessed with getting your own
advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.”
Jesus said to love your
neighbor as yourself. That is quite a tall order and so hard to do. When your
neighbor is your coworker who wants to share with you (yet again) a little too
much detail about her overly dramatic life, it’s hard to love her like you love
yourself. When your neighbor is your boss who is in the hospital all the way
across town and you know you should visit him but you have so much to do, it’s
hard to love him like you love yourself. When your neighbor is your wife who
had a really bad day on the same day you had a bad day and she wants to talk all
about it while you just want to chill out, it’s hard to love her like you love
yourself.
But if you make the effort to
remember that it’s not “all about me,” that God has made you for Himself, and
act on that belief by putting God and others first, I believe that you will reap
the reward promised in Matthew 20:16, that the last shall be first in the
kingdom of God. Then maybe you and I can sing “It’s all about you, Jesus” and
really mean it.
ninetyandnine.com
© 2005 Leann Guzman
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Leann Guzman
is ninetyandnine.com’s
new “Family / Work Issues” columnist. If you have suggestions on topics to
explore, email her at
Family@ninetyandnine.com. Leeann is wife to Jonathan and mother to Olivia,
and she lives and goes to church in North Texas. She is a licensed attorney who
works as a municipal court prosecutor. Although fluent in English and Legalese,
the meaning of the term “spare time” escapes her. |
