|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
The
Judgment Zone: Simple Mistake or Simply Mistaken? May 14, 2007 By Cylinda Nickels I never expected that I was entering the judgment
zone while walking into Walmart that Saturday. Although I had planned to quickly
exchange some tennis shoes for Emma, I found it increasingly difficult to push
my cart because it was now overrunning with groceries. (I hate it when their
marketing powers work on me!) The checkout line
resembled a queue from 9th grade geometry class. I could barely make
out the face of the cashier somewhere up there. I told big sister Seanna she
could take Emma over to the next aisle to look at the books. Well, Seanna
came marching back sans (that means without) little sister. I immediately
freaked. I was thinking I should run up to the cashier (but I would be out of
breath), and yell, “Lockdown! I can’t find my 5 year old!” I looked at
every aisle close to where we were. I prayed and prayed and just about passed
out. Suddenly, over the loudspeaker system I heard
“Would Linda (that is not my name) who lost her party come pick
up her party at aisle 23?” That was three lanes over. I bolted over. There was
Emma crying, with two elderly ladies, their hands on hips, shaking their heads
at me. I suddenly had ESP and read their minds, “How can she leave her
precious daughter? How could she lose her? She is an unfit mother.” I smiled tightly at them and hugged Emma,
explaining that Seanna and I had been frantic to find her, that she did the
right thing, and anything else that entered my mind. The ladies followed me back
to my cart. I thought of tumbling the Joyce Meyers book display over on them,
but I listened to the other voice in my head instead (thinking back—bad
choice). After all, where did they come from? Do they just hang out at Wal-Mart,
hoping to find lost children to chide their worried mothers? Yet all was well, and amazingly enough, a big
hug, a cool bottle of water, and Emma’s hand permanently attached to the cart
made things perfect. Second Thoughts I thought as I drove home: Wow, I didn’t know I
would be in the judgment zone. I could see those ladies as they got together
over bingo later, still shaking their heads and wagging their fingers. (Or was
that wagging their tongues and shaking their fingers?) My thoughts then went back to the topic I had
spoken on at our ladies meeting Monday night. The journey of giving is one of
life’s hardest journeys. Giving an old toy, a used piece of clothing,
something of no value—that’s not hard at all. Yet a child, now, that’s a
different thing. That is where the journey of Hannah’s taking Samuel to the
temple takes us. After having “lost” Emma, I have a new appreciation of
Hannah’s gift to God. For years Hannah had nothing to say when the
housewives got together over coffee. She never had the smell of Johnson and
Johnson baby powder in her room. She did not have tiny fingers and toes to
bathe. And her husband did not understand. How can you want more? You have my
love! It was bad enough that her husband did not understand, but he had another
wife who mocked her. I can see her downcast eyes, year after year when going to
the temple to make their sacrifices, and she was still barren. The priest
didn’t understand. She prayed so hard that words couldn’t even come out;
then he cast her to the side, proclaiming her drunken. She said, “Oh no,
it’s a child. I want a child, and if He gives me one, I will return the child
back to Him” (I Samuel 1). Nine months later Hannah had a child. She made
sure he always smelled of Johnson and Johnson baby powder. And every night she
told him the stories of Yahweh and of His house, the temple, “Only the special
boys can be there. Only those that are most loved by their mothers.” Then the day came when the time of weaning was
over. I can only sense the queasiness that must have engulfed her stomach.
The pathway of giving up her son had begun. I can imagine the housewives with
their straw brooms cleaning the sidewalk as she walked past them. And they must
have judged: “She must not love hers the way I love mine. I could never give
my child away.” Misunderstanding, judgment, harsh thoughts, quick speculation,
all bringing hurt to others. Yet Hannah was on the other end of fulfilling her
promise to the Lord. Unseen But Appreciated Actually, instead of “giving her child away,”
Hannah was fulfilling her destiny. She was giving back to the Lord what she had
promised. By her giving of Samuel, the Lord opened up her womb and she had more
children. What is the Lord asking you to place on that
altar? What do you need to give up so that He can fill you with so much more?
The journey of giving? Yes, it’s hard, but God can fill only those vessels
that are empty. ninetyandnine.com © 2007, Cylinda Nickels --------- Cylinda Nickels will
stick to Target from now on and hope for a judgment-free zone.
She works full time as a travel
agent, but her passion is for her position as assistant coordinator for MK
Ministries.
|
|
|
